I am fast asleep. Possibly even snoring. I'm at a nice party with Kate Walsh, Ellen and Matthew Perry. We are discussing a broadway play I wrote. Suddenly Matthew is a dog and he growls and barks. I look around at the pitch dark and realise it's not Matt that is a dog, but it's Gypsy that is growling and barking. There are weird banging noises coming from the kitchen. Then something falls. I get out of bed slowly and quietly, grab the rolling pin next to me and my Reebok shoe because I'm pretty sure I'm being robbed. With one hand on Gyp's halter I make my way to the kitchen. I'm ready to clobber anyone who is inside. My fight face is on and there is a scream in my throat.
I scream when I go in to find 3 winged rats flapping about. They are more commonly called pigeons! They are flying about shedding their dander and feathers, not to mention leaving me green presents - an early Christmas present if you will!
Annoying!!!! I shoo them away and then I'm forced to clean the damn mess! And of course my dog decides that this is a lot of excitement and so she needs to go for a walk. At 5:30 in the morning till freaking 6:45!!! I'm exhausted, my legs feel like jelly and this is from the dog who previously would bite my hand off if I tried to get the leash on her and I had to wake HER up at 6 for a walk!
This is what happens when the 2 year old beagle comes for a walk only at about 6:30. She WAITED for him and wouldn't let me take her back to the apartment untill she saw him!
Man. There are cougars and then there's my dog! Nice. This is also the period when the 22year old me has NO men in her life while the old doggie has not one, but 3 suitors! All under the age of 5!
This is very good for my ego. Really.
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