When you normally come across the word, or thought, "serial killers" you think of Ted Bundy, or Jack the Ripper or some other heinous person who did those horrible things. It is usually met with disgust, and a slight fascination of the morbid.
Today, I'd like to introduce a mother-daughter duo, who have plagued Bangalore's cacti population. They call themselves The Cacti Killers. The duo target their victims in a garden called Lalbagh, the biggest garden in Bangalore. A target rich environment, the duo watch and observe their potential victims carefully before choosing them. The study of behavior, aided by the plentiful information available through the groundskeepers and various pamphlets, is undertaken very seriously and then, the victims are chosen.
The victims have no idea that they are so close to their deaths, as they are picked up and physically examined. The greener they are, the more chances are that they will be taken. Bought even. They are chosen for their ability to survive even in the harshest of conditions, to pull through and live. If they can live in the dark, then they are definitely on the victim list.
Once they are bought, they are taken to the lair of the duo, where they are fooled into believing that they were "adopted" into a home. They are transferred into pretty pots, given sunlight and some very tasty natural fertilizers. The psychological and physical torture that the duo are known to inflict on the poor unsuspecting victims is started.
The victims first believe that they will be left alone to enjoy the dryness, reminding them of where they came from, the desert. Alas, that thought barely lasts an hour, when the duo water them. Every time, the pot is dry, it is watered. They are fed fertilizer till they feel like puking. The duo adopted the "I love too much" technique. Within a week, they are finished.
This process goes on for a while, victim after unsuspecting victim, till the duo decide to change their tactics. Once again, the chosen victims are brought home, and are completely neglected. The mother goes out of town for extended periods, and the daughter simply forgets. The green cacti slowly begin to become brown and then they join their peers of killed cacti.
Soon, the duo advance and this is not enough for the them. They crave some excitement in their lives. To keep at least one of their victims alive, for longer than two weeks. The mother goes on shorter trips, the daughter suddenly remembers. The unsuspecting victims are tortured by the unsuspecting killers. The once brown, neglected cacti become green with the love, then brown again, then green. The duo are confused and cannot choose between excessive love and tough love. The victims then give up and just die on the duo.
One day, the duo, looking at the empty pots realize that it is not in them to continue on their killing spree. Remorse hits them like a truck carrying a ton of bricks. They put the pots away.
There endeth the tale of The Cacti Killers.
This is the story of my mother and I, and how we desperately tried to find our green thumb, but failed miserably. If there is a hell, I imagine that mine will be full of Cacti waiting....
The victims have no idea that they are so close to their deaths, as they are picked up and physically examined. The greener they are, the more chances are that they will be taken. Bought even. They are chosen for their ability to survive even in the harshest of conditions, to pull through and live. If they can live in the dark, then they are definitely on the victim list.
Once they are bought, they are taken to the lair of the duo, where they are fooled into believing that they were "adopted" into a home. They are transferred into pretty pots, given sunlight and some very tasty natural fertilizers. The psychological and physical torture that the duo are known to inflict on the poor unsuspecting victims is started.
The victims first believe that they will be left alone to enjoy the dryness, reminding them of where they came from, the desert. Alas, that thought barely lasts an hour, when the duo water them. Every time, the pot is dry, it is watered. They are fed fertilizer till they feel like puking. The duo adopted the "I love too much" technique. Within a week, they are finished.
This process goes on for a while, victim after unsuspecting victim, till the duo decide to change their tactics. Once again, the chosen victims are brought home, and are completely neglected. The mother goes out of town for extended periods, and the daughter simply forgets. The green cacti slowly begin to become brown and then they join their peers of killed cacti.
Soon, the duo advance and this is not enough for the them. They crave some excitement in their lives. To keep at least one of their victims alive, for longer than two weeks. The mother goes on shorter trips, the daughter suddenly remembers. The unsuspecting victims are tortured by the unsuspecting killers. The once brown, neglected cacti become green with the love, then brown again, then green. The duo are confused and cannot choose between excessive love and tough love. The victims then give up and just die on the duo.
One day, the duo, looking at the empty pots realize that it is not in them to continue on their killing spree. Remorse hits them like a truck carrying a ton of bricks. They put the pots away.
There endeth the tale of The Cacti Killers.
This is the story of my mother and I, and how we desperately tried to find our green thumb, but failed miserably. If there is a hell, I imagine that mine will be full of Cacti waiting....
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he he he!!! :P
ReplyDeleteRead this thing somewhere which said if you can't keep a cactus as a pet, you're less nurturing than a desert :)
ReplyDelete